February Burlesque Bitch Horoscopes

Aries (March 21-April 20)

Silver tongue and golden heart

Not always wise enough apart

Think before you speak, my sweet

Else toes to ankles you will eat

Taurus (April 21-May 21)

Small successes greatly please

Put your heart and soul at ease

Family time spent most wise

Sudden news won't surprise

Gemini (May 23-June 20)

A cancellation frees your night

Kick up your heels, steal the spotlight

Virgo offers wisdom great

Good news comes, a little late

Cancer (June 21-July 20)

Though a tough decision blocks your way

What's in your heart is right today

Give an Aries a second chance

To make attempts to breech your pants

Leo (July 21-August 22)

Mean what you say and say what you mean

It may be time for a change of scene

Get out of town, or just out of your clothes

Gemini keeps you on your toes

Virgo (August 23-September 22)

Laugh at the hard parts, cry if you need

Strut through the red tape to succeed.

Your sweetie needs time with you to play

Leo and Libra add fun to your day

Libra (September 23-October 22)

Consider how big change affects your dreams

Everything is not always as it seems

A friend needs your understanding care

Even if she's a total bitch before you can get there

Scorpio (October 23-November 21)

Your opinions need voice this month, dear

An unfair situation requires wisdom here

Don't give in to a restless mood

Kick back and find a hottie who talks lewd

Sagittarius (November 22-December 20)

Your goals should be challenging yet fair

It may take some time to move here to there

Be patient with family, with Aries, and all

Then wrap yourself around something dark and tall

Capricorn (December 21-January 20)

A strange dreams hides what you already know

It's time to step in, take a stand, grow

Find focus through art, chase your zen

Forces are moving here beyond your ken

Aquarius (January 21-February 18)

Dive in to that project you've been ignoring

You'll find it easier, though no less boring

Keep an open mind with family spats

Don't forget how much you love those brats

Pisces (February 18-March 20)

Pop out of the box to solve a problem at work

Show it off to the boss, despite being a jerk

A bittersweet farewell will leave you blue

Positive thinking and love leads you true